Mu bashakanye, kuvugana Ku Bijyanye n’imibonano mpuzabitsina ntibigomba gufatwa nk’ikintu giteye isoni.
Abahanga mu buzima bavuga ko gushyira ku mugaragaro ibyifuzo, ibyo umuntu atifuza ndetse n’imipaka ye bishobora gufasha abashakanye kugira umubano urangwa no kubahana no kwizerana.
Hari abashakanye bashobora kumara imyaka myinshi babana ariko ntibigeze baganira ku buryo buri umwe yumva ameze mu bijyanye n’imibonano yabo. Hari n’abatinya kuvuga ko hari ibyo badashaka gukora, batinya ko mugenzi wabo yabifata nabi cyangwa akabatekereza nk’abatamukunda.
Nyamara, itumanaho ni kimwe mu bintu by’ingenzi mu mubano muzima. Ishami ry’Umuryango w’Abibumbye ryita ku Buzima (WHO) rivuga ko umubano mwiza urangwa n’itumanaho, kubahana, kwizerana no gufatanya gufata ibyemezo.
Ntibagomba gutinya kuvuga ibyo bakunda
Umugabo cyangwa umugore ashobora kubwira mugenzi we ibyo amva ko bimushimisha cyangwa uburyo yumva yakwishimira ko umubano wabo waba umeze.
Ibi ntibisobanura guhatira undi gukora ibyo atifuza. Ahubwo ni ukuganira no kumva mugenzi wawe, buri wese akagira uburenganzira bwo kwemera cyangwa kwanga.
WHO ishimangira ko ubuzima bw’imibonano busaba uburyo bwiza kandi bwubaha umuntu, butarimo agahato, ihohoterwa cyangwa ivangura.
Ntibagomba gutinya kuvuga ibyo batifuza
Kuba umuntu yarashakanye n’undi ntibivuze ko agomba kwemera buri kintu cyose mugenzi we amusabye.
Umuntu ashobora kuvuga ati “iki sinshaka kugikora” cyangwa “ibi ntabwo binshimisha”, kandi mugenzi we akabyubaha.
WHO ivuga ko ubushobozi bwo kuvuga “oya” ku mibonano umuntu adashaka ari kimwe mu bigize ubwisanzure bwo gufata ibyemezo ku mubiri we.
Kuvuga ku bibazo biri mu mibonano si ikimenyetso cy’uko urukundo rwashize
Hari abashakanye batinya kuvuga ko bafite ikibazo cy’imibonano, urugero nko kutishimira uko bikorwa, kubabara, kubura ubushake cyangwa kutumvikana ku byifuzo.
Ariko kubiganiraho bishobora kuba intambwe yo gushaka igisubizo, aho kubiceceka bikomeza kubaka intera hagati yabo.
WHO ivuga ko ubuzima bw’imibonano burimo n’imibereho y’umubiri, amarangamutima, imitekerereze n’imibanire, atari ukubura indwara gusa.
Nta muntu ukwiye guhatirwa
Ikintu cy’ingenzi kurusha ibindi ni uko ubwumvikane n’ubushake bw’impande zombi bigomba kubaho.
Nubwo baba barashakanye, umwe ntiyagombye gukoresha iterabwoba, igitutu cyangwa ihohoterwa kugira ngo undi yemere ikintu atifuza.
WHO ishyira imbere imibonano irangwa n’umutekano, kubahana no kutagira agahato cyangwa ihohoterwa.
Ikiganiro hagati y’abashakanye gishobora kubaka icyizere
Abashakanye bashobora gutangira ikiganiro mu buryo bworoshye, urugero bakabaza:
“Ni iki ukunda mu mubano wacu?”
“Hari ikintu wifuza ko twahindura?”
“Hari ikintu kikubangamira?”
“Ni iki twakora kugira ngo turusheho kumvikana?”
Ibi bigomba gukorwa nta gusebanya cyangwa gucirana imanza.
Muri make, imibonano hagati y’abashakanye si ikibazo cy’umubiri gusa.
Irimo kandi urukundo, icyizere, itumanaho, kubahana n’ubushake bwa buri wese. Iyo abashakanye bashoboye kuvugana ku byo bumva, ibyo bifuza n’ibyo batifuza, bishobora kubafasha kubaka umubano urushijeho kugira ubuzima bwiza.
Mwizerwa Ally
Rwandatribune.rw
